After dealing with a cheating spouse, how do you rebuild your self esteem?

I am separated, and dealing with ups and downs, but more ups now that i'm gone than downs. I do know I'm very attractive, but I also know if I meet a guy, I don't know how NOT to give my all, is that a self esteem issue, how do I change from being wifey to gf. I don't know how to date, or just do nothing. I t's like I have to do. ex my gf had a cook out, I spilled my drink, he husband grabbed the mop and started cleaning, I said no I spilled it, so I will clean it up. Then later that night, I bought liquor for everyone, it just felt good inside, later that night her husband said, try not to be so giving, men see that as a weakness. But for me its a strength of mine, I do my kids the same way, and NOW that I'm single do it to myself (giving). Is that something I need to work on, if so how?After dealing with a cheating spouse, how do you rebuild your self esteem?
I don't think being giving is a weakness, I think it's a beautiful attribute. What can be seen as a weakness, is probably not being assertive, taking responsibility for other's mistakes and generally being too apologetic.





Having self esteem is all about recognizing your personality traits and being secure and confident in them, without shooting yourself in the foot.After dealing with a cheating spouse, how do you rebuild your self esteem?
you are you and thats probably not going to change. being a giving person is not a sign of weakness and its not a fault..if all people were that way, the world would be a better place.


its not your fault he cheated..the bastard! youll pick up dating as you go along, just be yourself. there are probably a million men out there just waiting to love you just the way you are.
I was the same way giving to everyone till one something went wrong. From then I became some I didn't know no more. Sometimes gets good to change but not alot. Yes going back to the dating game is hard after being out of the game for so long. Just take your time. go out with friends and family. When you lest expect it, it will show up.
If what you say is true, you need another name other then sassy.


Just know that men will like you without going all the way. I suspect ( by your message) that might be what your really talking about. Being a giving person is a great quality. Not found in enough women these days.
Try to remember what it was like when you were dating. Just sit back and enjoy the company of someone else, let them treat you nice and go from there, after awhile you will become relaxed and start to enjoy the dating all over again...good luck
You need to get laid. Quit being so giving, and take what you want.





Peace.
get divorced, quit drinking
date others
Just date different people....you will get the hang of it. I don't see how being giving can be a sign of weakness......
Don't change who you are. That is the biggest mistake you can make. After all if your pretending to be someone your not down inside then how are you going to ever meet that right man who loves you for who you are? I know how hard the whole separation thing is as I'm just recently separated as well. Honestly I don't know how to do the whole dating thing again either, other than you just go for it and figure it out all over again. I've found the best thing to rebuilding self esteem is to just talk to people and let people get to know you. It may seem a bit odd but even a stranger in a chat room can make you feel better sometimes just by chatting. It doesn't have to even lead to anything it can be just good company and someone who builds you up.
When my ex spouse cheated and I dumped and divorced him, I did not have to rebuild my self esteem because I knew him cheating had nothing to do with me. He cheated because he was and is a loser.





I am a powerful woman with a huge amounts of assets and I didn't need anyone to tell me this...its what I know about myself. I have a lot to offer a guy and I am true to self.





You have to find your strengths within yourself and KNOW it. Don't let anyone tell you what you are; KNOW what you are, know that you are beautiful and a good person and go out there and make yourself a good life.
There is nothing wrong with being a giving person. You need to just be yourself. If a man finds your generosity to be a ';weakness'; then that is his problem. I really don't believe that all men feel that way. Just make sure that you don't overextend yourself or do it just to try to impress. But giving from the heart is just kindness. As far as your self esteem, remember that the person who cheated is the one with the problem not the person cheated on. And when the time comes that you meet someone and go on a date, just be yourself. Be the same way you would be if you were out with your gf. But try to take it slow and don't give ';your all'; away too fast. That can be intimidating to a man or some would try to take advantage. So each time before you offer up something, stop and think, is this something I really want to do. Could this person get by without my help? Really weigh all options before offering your services.